We have all dealt with them.
“Friends” who are only your friends when it’s convenient for them. “Friends” who take, time and time again, but NEVER give back. “Friends” who think the world revolves around them.
We have all been victims, and given them more than enough chances to change.
We have all given excuses for their behavior.
What I want to tell you is: IT IS OKAY TO STAND UP FOR YOURSELF. You can say enough is enough, and let go. You CAN free yourself from an empty friendship. I held on so tight to a couple of “friends” merely because I felt guilty. I thought walking away meant that I would be a bad person – that I am selfish. The truth is, saying goodbye means that you love and respect yourself. You understand the true meaning of friendship, and you are not finding it with that person.
I always talk about how precious time is… So the thing that means the most to me personally, is when someone MAKES time for me. I’m not talking about the, “Hey! Would you like to get together? My plans with my other friend got cancelled so I might be able to squeeze you in.” I’m talking about, “Hey! I work 50+ hours a week, my house needs to be cleaned, and my Grandma is in the hospital. But I really want to see you. Would you want to get together this week?” The first person is purely selfish, and treating you like a second option. The second person is willing to put everything aside to spend time with you. THAT is a friend.
I truly believe that people forget that friendship is a give and take. If your friend is there for you, than you need to be there for them. If they have dropped everything to take care of you, than you need to drop everything to take care of them. You cannot suck your friend dry of everything they have, and then expect them to keep giving. If you do that, your friend may choose to walk away, and she will have every right to.
I have always seen the grey areas in life, but with friendships, I see black and white. You are either with me or against me, and no one should ever make you feel like their friendship is a competition.
My loyalty has gotten me in trouble several times. I put it in the wrong person, and I got my heart broke. Yet, time after time, I kept coming back to them. I could not accept that I was losing a friend. I kept telling myself, “Maybe this time will be different.” It was never different. The same things happened over and over again. The knife in my back dug deeper.
I hate the idea of losing someone you once called a friend; it is one of the worst feelings in the world. You need to remember the good times you had together, and accept that your friendship was only for a season.
Be brave. Love yourself enough to know that you deserve more.
All my love,