Abandoned

We have all suffered from relationship heartbreak in one way or another.

 

Knot in your stomach.

Loss of appetite.

Staying up until 3 AM and sleeping until noon.

Obsessing over what they’re doing right now.

Wondering what you did wrong.

Wondering what she/he had that you didn’t.

Hating them.

Missing them.

 

My heartbreak came from my high school best friend.  I have never had someone make me feel so alive, and laugh so hard.  But I have also never had someone hurt me so much.

Looking back, I honestly couldn’t tell you exactly what went wrong; maybe because it happened so long ago or maybe because I tried my best to forget.

We talked all day every day.  We spent hours obsessing over who we would marry.  I was going to be her maid of honor, and she was going to be mine.  We had so many adventures together, and I cherished them so much… I guess I cherished them more than her.

One day she just stopped talking to me.  She pushed me away.  I didn’t know what I did. I was so lost and confused.  We eventually got together, and talked, but there wasn’t much to say.  I knew she had already made her decision.  She admitted to being closer with someone else, and being my “best friend” had become a burden she no longer wanted to carry.

She broke my heart.

To this day, I have no idea what I did.  Maybe I wasn’t pretty enough?  Talented enough?  Smart enough?  All I knew was that she threw away six years of friendship, and I was alone.

My purpose in sharing this is not to make her sound like a bad person.  She is one of the best people you’ll ever meet, and I truly hope she is living her life to the fullest.

I just want you to know that we have all suffered from heartbreak, and you are not alone in this.  It may take a week, a month or a couple years.  But you WILL make it through, and you WILL be stronger because of it.  It took me a year to heal, and several years after that to be open to new friendships.  I was so scared to get my heart broken again, and I’d be lying if I said I don’t get scared from time to time… because I do.  Everyday.

We need to remember that there is a time and a season for every relationship, and no matter how much it hurts, we must to let go.

I love you.

 

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